What If They Threw an Inauguration and No One Cared?

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This Friday, the States of America will once again pause to see the passing of the baton from the current President, Barack Obama, to a completely inept, out-of-place scuzzbag that will be referred to here as the GOP nominee. After eight years (and yes, that’s all he gets despite the wishes of others – the Constitution says so), Obama will pack up his family, take one last look at Capitol Hill and finally be able to shout “Fuck you, cocksuckers!” to those that obstructed him. At that moment, this idiocratic kakistocracy will take over.

For myself, I’ve never been a big fan of the inauguration of a President. I’ve never watched the parade, never cared about the speeches, and certainly don’t want to watch people dancing around in their finery. There’s only a couple of parades that I’m interested in:  the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade (it’s always the signifier of the start of the Christmas season) and any parade that a member of my family is in. Other than that, I don’t really want to sit around for several hours (live) or a couple of hours (on television) to watch floats, bands and other parade potpourri walk.

This year’s inauguration, then, is no different for me…I won’t be watching it, much like I didn’t watch Obama’s, nor Bush’s, nor Clinton’s. What makes it even easier is because there is absolutely no reason to give any “celebration” to the cacophony of idiocy that the minority of people have subjugated on the country through their vote nor the person who it is supposed to celebrate. No one wants to perform, save for a 16-year old who didn’t even win the competition she was vying for, a church choir, dancers who might have been forced to appear and the Great American Redneck(s), and there’s plenty of nice dresses available (despite Twitler’s protestations to the contrary). And it appears that many are coming around to the notion that hey, maybe we should have thought about this a bit more.

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While his minions continue to harp about how much he’ll do the “first day,” the GOP nominee has himself stated that he won’t be starting his new position until MONDAY. In an interview with the Times of London, the GOP nominee is quoted as saying, “Day one – which I will consider to be Monday as opposed to Friday or Saturday…my day one is gonna be Monday because I don’t want to be signing and get it mixed up with lots of celebration.”

The utter stupidity of this statement boggles the imagination. This fuckhead just took a job that is a 24/7 gig, not a 9-to-5 job. You don’t get weekends off…hell, you don’t even get VACATIONS off. Just ask the former Presidents how many days they said, “Fuck it…just going to go back to my mansion in (insert your favorite Presidential retreat here) and take a few days off.” As the President, you’re there FOR THE PEOPLE and the free world all the goddamn time. You’re taking briefings WHILE ON VACATION because, you know, shit can happen at any time. But this thimble-fingered imbecile seems to think that he’ll just be able to go about life, not a care in the world. How long before that wears thin on him?

Then there’s the constant circus that has been the parade of the Confederacy of Dunces to Capitol Hill. “Billionaire Betsy” DeVos, the choice of the orange-hued stain on the human condition for the Secretary of the Department of Education, couldn’t manage to get through her hearing without proving her total ineptitude for the position she was taking. Under questioning from Senator Al Franken, “Billionaire Betsy” couldn’t discern the difference between achievement testing and performance testing. She stumbled through another question on gun-free school zones by saying that weaponry might be needed to “defend against grizzly bears.” (Research into that has shown that, in recent history, there have been zero grizzly attacks on schools while there have been 210 attacks by people with guns since just 2013.)

Finally, Senator Bernie Sanders was the only one with the balls in the room to call her out. Sanders recited the litany of things that she hasn’t done that you might want in a Secretary of Education (didn’t attend public school, no collegiate background or degree in education, children didn’t attend public school, etc.) before noting that her family had donated “around $200 million” to GOP causes. “Do you think you’d be sitting here today if it weren’t for those contributions?” Sanders asked a woman who had NO REASON to be sitting there other than THAT REASON.

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I’d get into the GOP nominee’s choice for the Secretary of Health and Human ServicesRepresentative Tom Price – and his travails with non-payment of taxes, buying stock in companies and then writing bills to aid said companies and PROFITEERING off such actions or even the factor that major National Security Council personnel have been unable to brief their incoming replacements because those replacements HAVEN’T RECEIVED SECURITY CLEARANCES, but the real fun hasn’t even occurred yet. That comes on Thursday when former Texas Governor Rick Perry tries to tell a cadre of Senators that he’s ready to be the Secretary of the Department of Energy.

Perry, who once wanted to disband this organization before forgetting about it during the GOP debates in 2012 (now known as the “OOPS!” Moment), was reportedly thrilled when the GOP nominee asked him to fill the position. That was before he actually learned what the job was all about. Instead of ensuring the security of the nuclear arsenal of this country – the primary job of the Secretary of the department – Buckaroo Ricky thought that he’d be promoting the country’s oil and gas industry just like he did as the “guvner” of the Lone Star State.

Let that sink in a minute…this moron thought he’d be a glorified salesman, promoting a product to exactly whom isn’t known…

The continued Circus of Comedy that is being provided by the GOP nominee’s proposed administration (he’s already lost one person, former Fox News commentator Monica Crowley, due to her plagiarism of significant portions of a book she allegedly wrote…perhaps she can continue her wall research now) has sent many into a fit of navel gazing. The GOP nominee is coming into the office of the Presidency with the LOWEST APPROVAL RATING of any candidate since 1977. The GOP nominee’s approval rating is 37%, according to a Quinnipiac poll, a pitiful rating even for a scumbag that has shown no ability to grasp the importance of the job he ran for and no interest in even the base learning of the myriad of things he might face. Not only are the numbers overall for the GOP nominee in this shitter, his overall transition has been received less-than glowing reviews. An equal number of citizens of the States of America – 48% each – have said they either “approve” or “disapprove” of his transition period, according to a Gallup poll. The reason this is bad? NO ONE has ever seen numbers that bad when they were entering the Presidency.

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So we can lament the loss of the Ringling Brothers/Barnum & Bailey Circus, but it isn’t like we’re without new performers. In fact, a new circus is moving into the White House soon – just as soon as “wittle Barron” can pull himself away from his silver-spoon up their asses brats at his private school and Melania can get her “model scowl” just right – along with the Head Clown and a cast of characters. Unfortunately, the comedy of errors they’ll be presenting won’t be making anyone laugh as they wreak havoc on the country. As such, I won’t be watching when this embarrassment for the country is jutting his chin out like Mussolini as he reviews whatever high school band marches in front of him during the inauguration.

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